From Friend to Lover
by Misticore
Summary: Duo is going to kill himself and he tries to talk to the other guys, just to talk to them one last time. But, they don't have time, only Quatre does. Can Quatre figure out what's going on and stop him in time?


From Friend to Lover  
By: SS Raida  
  
Anime series: Gundam Wing  
Romance/alternate universe/mild angst  
No lemon or lime  
Shounen ai  
Pairings: 4+2+4  
Spoilers: None  
Parts: 1/1  
Rating: R  
Archive: Ask me first, please  
Feedback: Yes, please!  
Story blurb: Years after the death of his best friend, Duo decides he just can't stand it anymore, Solo having been on his mind for years, and decides to kill himself. Quatre may be the only one that can help Duo...will he?  
  
Disclaimer: I don't own Gundam Wing or any of its characters, nor do I claim to.  
  
Warnings: Mature themes, attempted suicide, possible OOCness, alternate universe, male/male situations.  
  
Duo sighed softly as he looked at the amber bottle of sleeping pills he held in his hand. This wasn't the bottle for his sleeping pills, but an old prescription bottle he had. He had them in this bottle, because there was more than one brand of sleeping pill there.   
  
'I've missed you so much, Solo...I thought I could go ahead and live and everything, like you wanted me to, but...well...I guess I can't...I'm sorry...but I just can't stay. I'll be with you soon, Solo.' Duo silently told his long deceased best friend, Solo.  
  
Duo had promised to live on, when Solo had told him that they'd always be together. But, he found that he just couldn't keep this promise. He had lived on...but he couldn't continue with it. He'd tried so hard, really he had, but he just couldn't stand it anymore. He knew Solo was never coming back. If he killed himself, maybe he could be with Solo again.  
  
"Maybe, I should talk to the guys one last time...I'll probably have to wait for the weekend to do it. I can spend time talking to the guys all week. Then, on Saturday, I can just go and not regret that I didn't tell 'em all everything I wanted to. Even if they hate me for some of the things that I have to say, they don't need to hate me for that long." Duo said to himself, having no idea why he was talking to himself.  
  
Duo put the pills away in his nightstand for when he would need them and gave a little sigh. There weren't too many for him to swallow all at once, he knew that much. He could swallow several pills at one time, but he did have a limit to that.  
  
Over the next few days, Duo tried to get in touch with the guys, Monday trying to get in touch with Heero, who said that he was too busy to be bothered. On Tuesday he'd tried to get to Trowa, but Trowa didn't seem to really have time for him, either. Nor did Wufei on Wednesday. But, on Thursday Duo had managed to get in touch with Quatre.   
  
Now, Quatre was usually busy, but he always made time for Duo. And, Quatre seemed to be able to tell that something was wrong. In fact, Quatre had known for a while, now, but he didn't want to say anything. He didn't like pushing and he figured that if Duo wanted to talk about, Duo would come to him or someone else.   
  
Duo was very disappointed that he hadn't been able to talk to Heero, Trowa or Wufei. He would have much liked to say goodbye to them. Apparently, they didn't care enough about him to make at least a half hour or even just fifteen minutes of their schedule clear for him. He only wanted to talk to them for a few minutes, it didn't have to be two hours!  
  
But, Quatre had allowed three full hours of time to talk! And, Quatre was the busiest person he knew! So, he would just have to find some way of getting Quatre to tell the other guys the stuff that he couldn't tell them, because they didn't have time when he needed them, too. He wasn't going to put off suicide for too long.  
  
Duo made sure to be dressed as he usually was. He always wanted to look so nice for Quatre...He'd saved Quatre for last, because he was always inclined to save the best of the best for last...And, Quatre certainly was the best.  
  
In truth, Duo had feelings for Quatre that went beyond friendship or brotherly. But, Duo never said anything, because he was quite sure that Quatre had the hots for Trowa. So, why say anything, when you know it could just hurt the friendship that he was lucky to already have.  
  
If he told Quatre that he like liked him, or even loved him, then it might be hard for Quatre, if he weren't interested, to feel comfortable around Duo. Knowing that Duo was harboring feelings for him that Quatre didn't feel for Duo in return, could put a real damper on the relationship. It was hard to stay friends after one of the two wanted to be more. Or even if it was just a wish.  
  
Duo rushed right over to Quatre's, because he'd been told to come whenever he wanted. He wanted to go now! He wanted to see Quatre as soon as he could.  
  
When he'd gotten there, he was shown right away to Quatre. Apparently, Quatre had made it known to all in the household that Duo was coming.   
  
Duo didn't mind any hurrying or pushing and shoving if he wasn't going fast enough, it was all worth it when he saw Quatre's smiling face.  
  
"Hello, Duo!" Quatre said, smiling brightly. That smile was enough to make Duo forget just about anything he wanted to say or do.   
  
In fact, Duo stumbled as he tried to walk over to Quatre, so that he could sit across from him.  
  
"Hey, Quat." Duo said, absolutely forgetting anything else he wanted to say. He just hoped he didn't sound like a lovesick cow or something...  
  
Quatre laughed softly, though it was clear that he wasn't laughing AT Duo...  
  
"What?" Duo asked, blinking owlishly.  
  
"Nothing, nothing. You wanted to talk to me?" Quatre asked, never losing that gorgeous smile of his.  
  
"Uh...yeah...Thanks for making time for me, Quat. I mean, none of the others were able to." Duo said, sounding as disappointed as he felt.  
  
"What do you mean?" Quatre asked him concerned by what he was feeling and hearing.  
  
"I mean, when I called 'em and wanted to talk to 'em, they said they were busy." Duo answered simply.  
  
"That's rude." Quatre said. He really did think it was rude when you couldn't make at least a little time for your friends.  
  
"It's okay...I just wanted to talk to 'em. Can do that any ole time, right?" Duo said, grinning. Though, Quatre was able to see through the mask Duo had put on, by what he was feeling from Duo. And, it was enough to depress even Quatre!  
  
"Duo, are you alright?" Quatre asked, concern showing in his eyes and face.  
  
"Yeah, sure, Q, why?" Duo asked, as if he really didn't see why Quatre had asked Duo this question.  
  
"Well, because, you don't seem alright..." Quatre said, wondering if he was pushing, but decided that he just couldn't ignore this anymore. Maybe, Duo was doing this in hopes, somewhere in the back of his mind, that someone would realize what was going on and they'd stop him from doing something terrible. Quatre didn't even want to THINK about that...  
  
"You're paranoid or somethin', Quat. I'm totally fine. I'm the one that has to get everyone else to be okay again..." Duo said, with a grin.  
  
"Yes, I know that, Duo...But, I haven't seen anybody trying to get you to be okay again..." Quatre reminded, though he knew it was totally lame.  
  
"That's because, I don't need it!" Duo said, never losing his grin, seemingly confident that he had won this minor argument.  
  
"Well, I'm sorry, Duo, but I just don't think you ARE okay." Quatre said.  
  
"What?? What are you talkin' about?? Anyway, I fail to see how you would even know. You can see by the way that I was acting, that I was fine, until you started all this. I only wanted to talk to you. Geeze, if all everyone thinks when I wanna talk to them is that I have a problem, maybe I shouldn't talk to you guys anymore." Duo said, though mentally smacking himself.  
  
'How could I say that to Quatre?! And on the last time I'll see him, too! Damn, I'm such an ass!' Duo thought to himself.  
  
"No...I'm sorry, Duo, but...I can just feel all these negative emotions from you...I can't really help it. But, please, Duo, I know something is wrong. I don't want to pry, but I'm afraid not to. Tell me what's wrong..." Quatre said, looking at Duo with genuine concern.  
  
"Quatre, I'm fine...Look, let's talk about something else..." Duo said, trying to get the subject changed, because he didn't want Quatre to really catch on.  
  
"No...Normally, I would change the subject if I saw that something was making you uncomfortable, but this is just convincing me that something IS wrong, Duo. Please...let me help..." Quatre said, really wanting to help.  
  
"No. There's nothing to help, I'm fine! Look, I'm just gonna go and maybe we can talk some other time...Okay?" Duo said, getting up and heading for the door.   
  
Quatre got up, as well, hurrying to Duo and grabbing hold of his arm, basically showing him that if he was leaving, he would just have to drag him along, too.  
  
"Quatre, let me go." Duo said, sighing softly.  
  
"No." Quatre said, simply.  
  
"Why not?" Duo asked, as if he didn't know.  
  
"Because, something's wrong, and I'm not going to let you go until you tell me what it is." Quatre said.  
  
Quatre hated to even think about trying to force Duo into telling him what was going on, it could just make it worse, but if he didn't do SOMETHING this could all have dangerous and even fatal results, such was the height of what Quatre seemed to be able to feel from Duo. He didn't understand what was stopping Duo from breaking down and crying right then and there...But, perhaps Duo had more willpower than he was even giving himself credit for.  
  
"Quatre..." Duo said, trying to sound warning.  
  
"Duo, I'm not playing games anymore. Tell me what is wrong, right now, or I'm going to have everyone in this whole place on high alert and make sure you CAN'T leave. I won't allow you to leave until you tell me." Quatre said, obviously now that he'd convinced himself he knew something was wrong, he wasn't going to just let it go.  
  
"Why do you care?" Duo asked, sighing a bit.  
  
"Because, I do! I'm your friend! Now, tell me, damn it!" Quatre said, starting to get mad and very frustrated.  
  
"Quatre, let me go." Duo repeated.  
  
"DUO!" Quatre cried out in what seemed to be quite a bit of frustration.  
  
"Okay, okay..." Duo says, sighing...He tried to think of a way to not really tell Quatre without actually lying, but he couldn't.   
  
"Good, now tell me." Quatre said, not letting go.  
  
"Could you let go of me first?" Duo asked, raising an eyebrow.  
  
"I hate to say it, Duo, but...I don't trust you enough to let you go right now...I'm afraid you'll run away." Quatre said.  
  
"Quatre, that's silly..." Duo said.  
  
"Then, promise me that you won't run away...And, I'll let you go." Quatre said.  
  
"Fine. I promise I won't run away." Duo said, sighing softly...No fair...Now, he had to stay...  
  
Quatre took Duo back over to their seats and listened as Duo told him all about Solo and how much they'd meant to each other, having been best friends, and actually life-lines, and eventually how Solo had died and about the last words they'd spoken to each other while he was alive and the promise he'd made and about how hard he'd tried to keep his promise...And, finally about why he'd wanted to talk to each of the pilots.   
  
When Quatre heard that Duo had been entertaining thoughts of seriously killing himself, he started to cry, thinking about how he'd almost just let it go...Which means he'd almost ignored it and let Duo kill himself!  
  
"Whoa, whoa, Quat, don't cry..." Duo said, going over to Quatre and putting his arms around him...Usually it was the other way around in situations like this, or so Duo had thought.   
  
Quatre couldn't believe that he'd almost let Duo do that, his friend, and the man that he really felt he could spend the rest of his life with, though doubted Duo would want him.  
  
"I can't help it! I almost let you do that to yourself! Duo, please don't do it. Please!!!" Quatre all but screamed, as he cried near hysterically.  
  
"Quatre..." Duo said, trying to think of a nice way to say no, and not make Quatre hysterical.  
  
"No!! Please, please promise me that you won't!!!" Quatre cried, really not wanting to lose another person that he loved. This was a different sort of love, but still...  
  
Duo doesn't say anything, but that doesn't help Quatre. He wanted him to promise that he wouldn't kill himself.  
  
"Please!" Quatre said, crying still, he wouldn't stop...not until Duo promised him.  
  
"Why, Quatre?? I told you everything and you still want me to live...I just don't understand why you won't let me die...I'm going to die eventually anyway." Duo said, trying to reason a bit.  
  
"Because, I love you!" Quatre yelled, and then wondered why the Hell he said that...Like THAT was going to get Duo to not kill himself...Even though it was totally true, he did love Duo, as much as he possibly could.  
  
"W-what?" Duo said, not believing that he'd actually heard that. No...he didn't hear it...just hearing things.   
  
"I said...I said, I love you." Quatre said, biting his lip and sniffling. He was trying not to cry anymore...but, he still wanted Duo to promise him...he just doubted it was going to happen now.  
  
"I...but...why?" Duo asked, finally, after thinking of how to phrase it.  
  
"I...don't really know...I just love you...everything about you...Inside and out..." Quatre said, fumbling over the words a bit. He wasn't used to telling people that he loved them in this fashion.  
  
Duo didn't really know what to say. Was he dreaming again? Yeah...that had to be it. He was just dreaming. Another dream about Quatre saying that he loved him. Yep, that's all it was. It wasn't true. That was just way too much of a coincidence...  
  
"I-I know you probably don't think of me that way...and, I'm sorry...but, please, don't kill yourself...Please..." Quatre pleaded, softly.  
  
"I..." Duo started, now finding himself more inclined to want to live. Quatre, the guy he loved, just told him that he loved him and that had to take a lot of guts, since he obviously didn't think Duo felt the same way and since Duo hadn't said it first.  
  
"Please?" Quatre pleaded softly. Even if Duo didn't feel the same, even if Duo never spoke to him again, even if he never saw Duo again, he just wanted him to live until he died an old man in his bed.  
  
"Alright, Quatre..." Duo said, softly, hugging him closer and nuzzling his face into Quatre's hair.  
  
Quatre gave a little gasp and wondered why Duo was being THIS affectionate with him...It was too much to hope for that Duo loved him in return, he knew, but still...  
  
"Quatre...?" Duo asked, softly, wanting to make sure Quatre would be paying attention.  
  
"Yeah...?" Quatre asked, softly, trying to keep the immense hope out of his voice.  
  
"I love you, too..." Duo said, giving a little smile. Solo was right...he did find something to live for...  
  
Quatre gasped, smiling at the same time and looked up at Duo.  
  
Duo kissed Quatre softly, hoping that Quatre wouldn't mind it.  
  
Quatre didn't mind at all, he returned the kiss, in Heaven, now that he knew Duo loved him as well and that they'd be together...And, of course, that Duo wouldn't kill himself.   
  
  
  
The End  
  
  
Author's note: I know...I'm dumb. But, this is my first 2+4+2...Not that that's mega important to anyone, m'just sayin', if it's bad...that's probably why...--;;; And, yes, I am very aware that I left Sister Helen and Father Maxwell out. -_-;;; 


End file.
